House of Curiosity...

 Last week, I was in a conference in Beirut. The conference was about the emerging youth identity in the Arab world. I will not write about the conference or the research. But I would like to write about a comment by a yemeni participant.  He said something along this line “Yemeni women have been recently given the right to own land.” So I asked him “and how do you guys feel about it?” he answered “we are worried, we are afraid that women will feel that they can leave their marriages, or will stop getting married because they have the land now.”  On one level, his comment surprised me, but on another level, I thought, this guy was speaking on behalf of many Arab men.

 The comment brought up a conversation that keeps repeating itself in my life: Women and property. 

 Stories about women and property

 In a conversation I had with N. couple of years ago, she complained about this particular issue. N and her husband made an agreement that anything they will purchase after they got married, should be registered in both their names, regardless of who brings the bread home. She felt, at that point, that she had given up her career to take care of him and the children, and felt that she deserved to share his money and his property. She complained however, that every time they purchased something, things worked out in a way that the property ended up to be registered in his name alone!

E. on the other hand, was getting engaged. Her fiancé was about to purchase their dream house, she suggested that she should pay part of it and co-own it with him. But the idea was shot down before it even got the chance to reach his parents…. He told her clearly, that his family would find this offensive.  It would have given the impression they could not afford buying the house and therefore she had to help… her intention was to co-own the property that was going to live in anyway.   (She ended up buying a piece of land somewhere with the money she was going to contribute to the house)

L. is a third example…. She comes from one of these business oriented families. The family buys property and land for girls in the family in return for their share of the family business. However, they don’t allow them to be part of the business…

What do they say?

Would women give up their marriage or stop getting married if they have lands?

Hala (house wife, 54)

“Bullshit! Women have the right to own land. Fatima, the prophet’s daughter, owned a small garden, and she stuck to Ali till the end.  Why can’t other women do the same?”

 Kifah (counsellor , 39)

A lot of women choose husbands based on their financial status. If they own property, the pressure to choose financial support becomes much less, and therefore they choose based on compatibility. Therefore I think It is the opposite, if women are financially independent, the quaity of their choises improves.)

 Maria (teacher, 61)

“This is the masculine perspective. A woman would never leave a husband that she respects and loves for land. At a certain age, companionship becomes the most important thing for women… However, maybe men have been getting away with a lot in the name of financial support. The question that should be asked… do they deserve to be with the woman they are with? Only independent women can answer this question.”

Lara (Marketing guru 26)

I don’t believe women would stop getting married if they own land, or maybe this is the way things are here in Jordan.

I think men feel threatened that women can leave them any time since they can become independent after owning a piece of land. This is only in the minds of men where they should be the providers, but women in nature need to settle down and have a family, it’s instinctive. However, if women live in an environment where they need to rebel and retaliate then this would be their chance to prove that they do not need men.

Either way it’s good to show men that women are not to be taken for granted, to sleep with one eye open

 Hamza ( salesman, 24)

It is true. We know how women think (so emotionally ) and they have speedy reactions. If she gets angry with her husband for any small reason, she will leave, because she has the land and can live alone.

 Issam (IT guru, 31)

I can’t help but laugh. Please excuse me but this is the silliest logic I’ve heard for a long time.
While financial dependence on the man is dominating in the marriage relation, I can’t see how financial well being of a woman could lead to a tendency to abstain from a relationship or marriage.

 I would like to take the thought a step back, a peek in the recent history.

Women property rights in the ottoman empire

According to Amira El-Azhary Sonbol in her study Women of  the Jordan (2003), Ottoman records show that women’s property rights were implemented at all levels of the Islamic legal system. They show that “no one, including the husbands or even fathers, could make use of women’s property without their consent, and women appealed to the courts when anyone tampered with their assets.”

It seems that women’s property rights started declining with the European colonization.  Women got caught between the western imperialism and the conservative Islam that started spreading faster and faster.

Back to today’s world

I no longer think it is about women at all… I think it is about the land.  I just learnt that some tribes have an unwritten agreement, where, people should not sell land outside the tribe. Land equals status and bargaining power, therefore should stay within the tribe. The problem in the case of women is when they marry outside the tribe. In that case, land will be no longer the property of the tribe.

According to a survey that was conducted by freedomhouse, women’s access to inheritance, housing, and property is affected by their educational level, family support systems, economic status, and access to legal information and mechanisms. One thing for sure, women don’t get their share of inheritance or property.  In some cases, when they are not financially independent, and don’t have any providers, they cede their share of family land to their brothers, in return of economic support.

The problem is that governments do not take aggressive steps to enforce women’s inheritance and property rights and often allow abuses to go unpunished.