An experience of a girl on the streets of Amman
I was walking in swefieh… in the Che che, Starbucks and the new church area… I was dressed respectably (of that I am 100% sure) actually I was wearing sports outfit, black pants and a big blue jacket… the outfit was not even sexy… it was comfortable and conveniently ugly!
… A guy drove by in a fancy car, slowed down and stopped at some 100 meters in front of me…
I was tempted to cross the street, but then decided that I should not let him intimidate me.
So I kept going…
He opened his window, and started shouting numbers… 200? 300? Ok 500… I soon realized that it was JDs he meant! This guy either thought I was a prostitute and was offering money in hope of service, or he simply was acting like a jackass! Which probably was the case.
I kept going without even giving him a second glance. I know how cruel it is not to acknowledge the existence of a human being… and this guy, certainly, did not deserve to be acknowledged.
He kept following me.
I turned left to a side street and he drove back and forth at least ten times in that street, till I reached my destination….he waited a bit, and then realized that I was not going out any time soon, and so he left, probably to bug another girl…
Ohh.. the car had a Qatari number.. It really is upsetting, that some people from abroad come to Jordan, thinking that girls who walk in the streets are free game… I am not saying that our local guys are better…… but still, when you go as a guest somewhere, the minimum requirement is to practice some self respect….
Our local guys… akh from our local guys…they have succeeded into turning the experience of walking in our lovely Amman into a very unlovely experience….I can almost swear that any Jordanian girl, regardless of her dress code or background can share horror stories related to her experiences in walking in Amman…. girls get exposed to men’s dirty words, and pathetic sexual frustration at a very early age…and they never share their stories, because they know that their families will only practice more control over them…. so they internalize their bad experiences and move on…. moving on is their silent resistance to things they can’t control
Actually… I am tired of writing about this … so will go watch Dance with me instead!
props for writing on this M. This sounds like a rough time, and I’m impressed you put your experience out there. Strong voice.
Reply
Madas Reply:
October 15th, 2009 at 06:31
Thanks,
rought time? come on, girls are used it in Jordan… it should change, and hopefully if people become aware of it… it will… thanks for the comments
Reply
If i was there and i witnessed this i would go to guy and kick his sorry qatari ass, No one messes with our local girls
Reply
Madas Reply:
October 15th, 2009 at 06:32
Ali, he cold be Jordanian living in Qatar
but it is nice to know that if some of our guys saw guys being nasty to girls they would react… I hope more guys would feel like you
Reply
Hi;
I think someone should build a website where girls post mobile photos of those men who harassed them with the comment they’ve said..
I think girls should fight back and expose those people.. everyone has a mobile camera and I think it can be a good weapon to put those people on sham
I am thinking to build a section on ishki.com to serve this purpose
Reply
Abdullah Reply:
October 13th, 2009 at 11:54
nice idea and I will do a good SEO for this site so people can find numbers easily via search engines
Reply
Madas Reply:
October 15th, 2009 at 06:33
Wael and Abdallh… Great idea… go ahead with it… Abdallah … hopefully more girls will be aware of this
Reply
kinzi Reply:
October 26th, 2009 at 10:58
If you build it, I will come. I will even buy a camera phone. I am sick to death of being propositioned (even when I have kids in my car at stoplights)
Reply
now you know why i hate walking in the street and prefer to do so inside the Nadi?? i love my bubble
it’s idiots’ free.
yesterday i was driving and an idiot was flashing his car lights behind me, i let him pass and his car plate was also something gulfi. ya3ni inta daif 3inna, ist7i.
bas i realized that walking without a male in this country is not nice, no matter how old or young this male is. it’s like guys don’t dare doing anything to guarded ladies. y? because they know that they can get beaten up. Next time you have to tell him :”inzal” o then hit him infront of everyone in the street “irja3 3a sayyartak ya dabbeh
”
Reply
Actually its sad to see such stories in Jordan , I think its all about personality.
but to be honest I suggest the followings:
1-Wael idea (check comments) :doing a website and we add facebook app + tweeting engine to tweet all numbers and pics of those rude people.
2-I urge girls to catch number of such cars , cuz u never know when u can get ur revenge from such rude guys . and u can use this number in that website or to complain to Police.
3-Guys on the other hand should not allow such thing to happen when they are in groups “sheleh”.
4-Each guy should think in any girl as his sister (Would any one accept to see someone annoying his sister while walking on the street).
5- Plz ,Girls , u should believe that Jordanian laws supports u always in such cases. : dont be shay not to complain to any police station about such rude guys.
get benefit from the Jordanian Shahameh (when u complain ,Good Police will give him a good gift;) , jail will be his home for like 1-2 years and his record will have a red point “قضية تحرش” )
-more efforts should be taken in school to raise up better generations.
finally : shame on all guys who were there and kept silent when this A**hole Qatari did what he did .
Reply
Samah Reply:
October 13th, 2009 at 23:34
I’ve a freind who once contacted the police beacause some guy bothered her.. and they made ( ma7dar after getting him into the makhfar ) .. so yes the law helps in such cases !!!
Reply
I’ve lots of stories to tell regarding this issue ..
BUT.. eventhough, i keep on walking, wearing my frawn, putting on my headphones, my dark sunglasses, and try to enjoy the power-walk no matter what!
Lately, i’ve been walking with a group to avoid such comments!
you gotta join us at some point ( Fast Walk Group on Facebook )!
Best
Reply
Madas Reply:
October 14th, 2009 at 08:38
Wallah many people have been telling about this… i might bring my mom and just join
and i miss you.
Reply
Samah Reply:
October 14th, 2009 at 22:21
Miss you loads Mariam ..
I think Khalto will enjoy the walk ;D
Hugs ..
Reply
Thank you for sharing your story it is really sad to say that I believe you as I am a Jordanian girl who has been away for 10 years from Amman and every time I visit it’s the same story! mind you I never walk in the streets of Amman, I get those ugly comments from Jordanian men if I am just crossing a street to my destination or getting out of my car or even driving in my car!
I call on the government to issue a strict legal punishment to those who dare to harass women, and clean the streets of Amman from those psychos! and give women back the right to stroll around Amman’s streets peacefully!
One more thing I really have to say, during all my 10 years living in the UAE I have never been annoyed or heard one word from UAE men! how did they manage to control that! I wish I know. I guess it’s just a good sign of civilization.
Reply
I agree with wael, I will start doing that, because to be honest i get this all the time non stop from even men who are old as my father or even grandfather! if i tell u stories u would go crazy, but i do as Samah does, but still u can see cars pulling over and waiting to see if they get lucky or not (sick perverts) even if u are wearing baggies stuff, they still look! I can’t believe how much sexually deprived men are in this country! but then again if i do what wael says I’ll end up taking photos of every single man I see in the streets
Thanks for the post
have a nice pervert free weekend guys
Reply
This is for the airhead ghettos who have such a behavior…. its freaking time to pass ur( what I call ) Pre-chakra !!!! allah yekoon be3oon el banat ya rab ,
Reply
A car plate with a non-Jordanian plate does not mean that the scum is a non-Jordanian. Next time please, call 191 and ask for help. Tell them that you are being assaulted. Few minutes of waiting and you can have a beautiful stage in front of you. Please do that ! Girls are somehow afraid to get exposed by contacting the police, while there is nothing to be ashamed or afraid of. Such practices could really reduce this stupid thing.
Reply
I can totally understand your frustration, i just hope that this breed of ‘men’ with time will grow use to seeing strong independent women and know better than throwing pathetic remarks at them … on the bright side, it’ll only be a matter of time before these guys get instinct! and it’s about time damn it!
PS: it really puzzles me that a lot of people use this technique thinking that they’d actually get hold of the woman’s affection, have this ever actually worked? EVER? i hope they realize how pathetic this makes them look cause they’re making all the other guys look bad.
Reply
I think it’s disgusting. I have beaten a couple of heads in whilst being in Amman. I was once waiting for my wife to come out of the gym. I noticed two guy’s in a Jordanian numbered car (black BMW) waiting also outside the gym. They looked like scum and it turned out that they were scum. My wife came out and started crossing the road towards me, their reaction was to try to block her from crossing the road by driving in front of her, she stopped then they stopped, when she carried on walking they started driving again. So I got out of my car took my belt off and walked to the front of the idiots car and took a big swing at his bonnet amking a rather big dent and scratch on his daddy’s 2008 BMW M3 hahaha, the driver decided to get out but was faced with a belt buckle across his face, his friend didn’t even bother getting out of the car and started using his mobile phone. The driver at this time was a bit dazed and a bit shocked by what had hit him suddenly, I grabbed his neck and said to him “now you know how it feels to be abused” he tried to fight back at which point I pushed him into his daddy’s car and kicked the door shut into his face…..the good point was that the owners of the gym had seen this happening and thanked me because many girls had enquired about him and made complaints about him…furthermore this was done in front of a big croud so he felt very small and not the big guy that the thought he was….
Reply
Madas Reply:
October 21st, 2009 at 22:10
wow… this is a good story… these two B. definitely deserved what happened to them… it is good that people were there to witness , because this way they can’t get you in trouble… well done… more men should do this
Reply
lots of miserable bastards out there,you should ave called the cops on em…and take it from me,no matter how ugly you say your outfit is,you’d still turn heads every time
there is a major point here,this behavior does come from Jordanians too,it’s a social sickness which has increased rapidly during the past years,it has to do with the economy,the lots of newly rich and the change of..what they call,on a financial level il tabakat il ijtima3ieh? u know what I’m on about..they think their cash can get them anything,anywhere..sad eh?
next you’ll have to find a way to deal with online harassment
Reply
it sux that we all have stories of being harassed – but it’s great to see/hear more and more people expressing them … because without that knowledge of shared experience we’ll never be able to so anything about this epidemic … i’ve been working on a project since last year about harassment that involves filmmaking and initiative building … it’s becoming bigger and bigger and we need more skills – most urgently in the areas of graphic design, filmmaking, and animation … we need logo design so we can go global in cyber space … we need even more people to get on camera with stories and actions so we can go viral … we need animators to inject some serious dark humour into our film … contact me – i’ll tell you all about it: jackie@jackiesawiris.org … and feel free to pass this on … people – especially women – are ready to do something about harassment – and what we’ve been developing over the past year is just what we need
Reply
Madas Reply:
October 21st, 2009 at 21:21
wow what a great idea… I will circulate…
Reply
I agree with the cheek-slapping approach, it works pretty well. If that doesn’t work carry a gun next time.
I don’t understand why are girls scared of hitting stranger guys when you know they won’t hit back. If I were a girl I’ll be walking and just slapping men right and left just for the heck of it
Reply
hada ta5alof al3rab .. yali ma 3am y3rafo ytsarfo.. aw 3am ya3to fkra sy2a 3an amman … ana b3tber hada tsarof mt5alef … 5abi … law kel wahad btsarf be hal alshakel hada..aked ma ra7 zor baladi alordon .. w 3am by2olo hada watn yhmi almar2a… ma sheft she… shon 3emlo la hata yhmoni????
Reply
[...] An experience of a girl on the streets of Amman [...]
Can you imagine what the situation would be like for “lets say a none-Jordanian or God forbid a European Female ” in the country for a couple of months on an official assignment? Ha!!!! She is a target for every male. Her Arabic vocabulary will be enhanced by words such as “pssssst pssssst” “Ya 7abibi” followed by a hissing sound, and honk honk “tata tta” by every taxi driver in the vicinity. Not to mention the “Dumbo Look Gaze” on the faces of passers-by . However, once she is indoors let’s again say “for formal business issues”, the situation becomes more serious; every male would turn into an instant pet. Engineers, linguistics, managers …etc would turn into self appointed-ready to serve tour guides, shopping places experts, and most of all dinner hosts. Of course we must not forget that they all are heroes, done incredible things in their lives, and have most probably spent 90% of the meeting discussing themselves or indirectly talking about the economy of Nicaragua to impress her.
Reply
Madas Reply:
January 23rd, 2010 at 07:10
lol!
It is true… but i think this target every beautful woman, not only Europeans
it is more extremem in the came of Europeans…. anyway… this is how it is… we could either try to make sure the second generations of boys is more capable of dealing with women, or just leave the situation as is, and learn how to deal with it…
Reply
am agree with you all …. but girls wear clothes which attract guys to them, so it not guys mistake … what happening in street bcoz of bad culture of sexy life in jordan
Reply
madas Reply:
July 1st, 2010 at 19:40
yadi yadi ya….always blame it on the women.
Reply