Predators in public gardens
This has been on my mind for a while… a few months really. But I suppose I decided to write about it, after my meeting at Sahab. ( I never know when to use at and when to use in)
I had a workshop that revolved around creating a community center there. The discussion went into the direction of public gardens… since Sahab community was complaining about the lack of public spaces for children. A lady there said that the problem is not in the gardens themselves… even if there are gardens, she (as a mother) would not send her children to a public garden, since there is a lot of drugs activity going on there. …
Obviously that did not go well… people slaughtered her! They were so upset about her accusations for a number of reasons… maybe that she was a woman, maybe that we are not local and it felt like she was showing dirty laundry…. Does not matter…what matters is that public spaces have been used as ideal spaces for predators.
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I got the idea in one of those days that my sisters and I took the kids to a local park… We try to take them to a park on daily basis… truth to be known is that we don’t take them because of any brilliant maternal skills… but that is the most effective way to exhaust the kids to make sure they are in bed as early as possible…!
The thing is… I had noticed that whenever I go to a public garden, ….the demography of adults is something like: 6 Indonesian women, 5 Philippians, 4 Srilankan, one or two Europeans… No Jordanian women what so ever… European women go to public gardens to spend quality time with their children, Arab women send their maids to spend quality time with their children.
That particular day, there was a suspicious teenager going around, he would look for young children that are alone and just come close to them… with the maids busy socializing with each other and the mothers busy elsewhere doing whatever that they are doing… very young children are left vulnerable to pedophiles, drug predators, and other kinds of predators…
That particular day, my sister, who noticed this guy went to him and yelled her lungs out, questioning him on what he was doing, threatening to get the security guard… upon hearing this, the guy dissolved in oblivion… We never saw him again…
So basically, the presence of one responsible local adult, could save the future of a few children… whose duty or fault is it? Government? Predators? Children? Families? Or us locals who lack any sense of social responsibility and sense of belonging….. ? I wonder….
Speaking of different nationalities and cultures, I have recedntly watched My Big Fat Greek Wedding, for the 18the time probably… I still think it is the funniest movie ever made. It is sweet, hilarious and completely relevant.….
If anyone has any problems of harrassment please call the police (Family Protection Department) on their emergency number 111 or 5815826/5815846. You can also report any crimes of child abuse or sexual abuse. T
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Hi T.
Thank you for the tip… I will make sure to mention this next time i am in Sahab. I think people need this information.
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Madas ,for what value do I estimate my friends ? you are among them in an aspect of time and seldom but positive communications through your Blog ,it must have been what ?umpteen years ,thus I can not only perceive but allow my self to address you freely ,all of the above is to tell you ,you sound a bit troubled and lack the concentration which I am used in you .
Your post to day for my findings in it ,is some how composed of scattered ideas ,you are venting out through your ability to write ,but you wrote nothing of the subject you wish to propose .My comments may disappoint you ,but though I don’t know you in person ,I don’t wish to lose you as a friend .Please come back again with a concise subject of what you wish your readers to share and may suggest things to you .To me life can be understood only by looking behind ,but can be lived only by looking ahead ,looking behind you ,you have been a person with substance and vigor ,looking ahead you are not using your past colorful experience .If I am to lose your pinpalship,I don’t mind if that make you come back to what you really are . Don’t loose the small joys in hope for big cloudy happenings.Salam and serene peace to all of us .
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Dear Nadim,
Thank you for your comment. I value your feedback more than you think… beecasue like you i consider you a special kind of friend.
I suppose people go through changes… and these changes show in the blog. I went through a period where i was indeed troubled, but i am not anymore
am I scattered? yes… but what’s new? i think, there are so many ideas in my head that i was trying to communicate at the same time… an since i no longer blog often, i try to put them all in the same place… i will try to be more focused… to communicate one idea at a time… and then i don’t have time… i will put them in writing when i do… is that a good deal?
anyway… thanks again… and see you soon
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Delighted to hear from you and I do appreciate your vic verse kind of a sharing thoughts .It makes me happy to see you moving on with your Blog ,while we are at it ,why don’t you do same with your life .Think when we own a new car ,we are at all times keeping with the routine cervices ,and such is a time consuming practice ,yet we go on .So we better do the same with our lives ,give your self on your own stance( I know you know meaning of Stance ,but please look it at a webster dictionary to know what I mean) STANCE of mental and physical seclusion ,I am talking about minutes daily before your turn in ,play your thoughts as a video cassette in your mind and put the foreword and backward mode to your daily happenings ,and pose to analysis .Don’t take more than mental minutes .I am not trying to be a philosopher ,only maybe a mintor .with me being experienced by my age seniority I may allow my self to advice , because I care .And hate to see good humans like you go to waist .forgive me for crossing the border line ,but I care .
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Me again ,I looked up Stance over whole meaning on the Merriam Webster dictionary on line .you can copy and paste this link :
http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/stance%20
may be you can see what stance means to ones life ,I learned a lot from passing by words when I froze some of them ,and put under a magnifier ,and the overall results were so invigurating in changing my attitude .
Good look with your STANCE mission .
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Thank you for the kind advice. As a matter of fact i have moved on… Life is funny, you gain experience everyday… but the problem is that ( i read this somewhere) we don’t have a previous life to compare things to and KNOW that we are doing things right, and we don’t have a second chane, so if we screw up in this one… to know that we can make things bettwe in the next life… it is ONLY one shot…
I don’t think i am going to waiste at all… so no worries… on the contrary, i am stronger and more balanced now.
Now who is the philosopher?
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Again I am indebted to you tolorating my here say ,I admire you for your stand and perseverance ,God forbids I did not at all meant your hearsay ” I don’t think i am going to waist at all… so no worries… on the contrary, i am stronger and more balanced now” you have a stance which I can learn from you .We go through stages in life ,some material needs force us to change that’s not our case of discussion ,the other which is moral intellectual ethical things of this sort ,those are the ones that makes stand to reevaluate ,either we go on with same life style ,or depending on our since and sensibility ,we change internally because we are wiser by such experiences . Life is like a conveyor belt ,it careers and remember very well what it dumps .Because dear Madas if we stand to believe that we are the same people for a span that goes from teen age all the way to adult hood then geriatric old age , then we are like Dinosaurs did not adopt to changes thus they became instinct .You are right ones life is the same through out life ,but ones perception to his or her life is like ever green trees ,they bow to let off the snow in winter and flourish with a full size green branches .It is the use of words that can miss lead one another ,excuse my English which is not as good as yours , Your are the ever green the opposite of my only son though you could be the same generation ,but your are more tolerant and adaptable ,he can learn from you .I wish ….
Again it is becoming to an addicted delight of hearing YOU as much as hearing from you ,in such a concise domain being your “Inshallah deema 3amer Blog” .
With my care
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Me again ,I have a habit of re reading mine and your responses every time I send you my comment .
What attracted me is your saying in ones previous life !!! this made me remember the same subject which pertains to an article which I am doing about the Druze religious faith ,you a know a great part of there believes in their own faith is reincarnation .
Any way I have a weekly Email that I send/copy to a closed list of receivers, (friends like you) Last week it was about Damascus positive catalyst role in the flourish of Christian religion , before that it was about the Shiites faith ,and before that it was about different artists painters ,or musicians Etc ,when i say write ,I mean things that I like and research , I make a compendium of them and exchange with my friends .do you like me to copy you ? if you do ,then I need an email address for you ,nothing glamorous !!! but I find such is more rewarding than my old abandoned Blog,as I cant be committed to write at a certain day . if so please give me your email ,if not I can understand .Take Care
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Dear Nadim,
Thank you again for you comments… i read and reread them again just as you do… I feel embarassed by your kindness…
Youa re right, people change, and with these changes, their views and moral changes… I read my blog before, and i feel arrogran and ignorant at some of my views… I feel i was self righteous… holding people at higher standards than i allow myself… i think the change in views might be attributed to maturity, to becoming more realistic about life…
Now about you learning from me, la sama7a Allah… I can never even compare to your kindness and wisdom…. and based on this, of course i want you to add me to your email list… i will send you an email.. to the email you wrote here… is this your email? if so, I will write on it.
God Bless
M
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Week End humm , but different than other week ends not by the summer approaching , chaining Sunday!! which for a long time it was just another Sunday and was taken for granted it was ,and so what ? well this Sunday looks like to be a Bord one? well well No not at all my dear Sunday the day to day is the day of celebration {be Sa7noun El-Joumaha}to Day my dear Sunday we are celebrating the exchange of emails sundy budges in to open his mouth ( like the big powers exchanging treaties )no sunday you are out of focus but in a some way yes, from part I pledge to use madas emil with honer an care and miss use and kee it as guide to her email to reach at the port of saftey , my email for a better Email from dear Madass ,for mine and her is an equitable exchange .Don’t you agree dear Sunday!!! you do I wish it is not only for you ,but as a nice Sunday make sure to let your other brothers and sisters note such an exchange , as we may make our good Sundays in the middle (BA7ERA lousbou?)in the middle of the week .One ead leads the other this is ,the small thinks that mean on other .Yes Sunday You don’t have to pouch me . no I would not forget to give her my email >> nadimsolo@hotmail.com ,I think you are write ,I talk to much ,yes I heard you Sunday it is your turn to commence talking and acting as proud to remind Madass to send her email to me ,stop Sunday don’t talk to me give her some of your insistence and shoving , but hold I have to wish her a lovely Sunday to your ownYs Madass , /with care
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Hi Mariam, it sounds like you are keeping busy these days. This topic is one that concerns parents in the U.S. too. There are always predators lurking who will try to take advantage, or much worse, of children. When I was a kid, things seemed simple to me. I walked to my friend’s houses and to various parks by myself. My mother let me do that. All she wanted to know was where I was going. I am talking about me about age 6 to 8. Prior to that, she kept a much tighter control over me. However, these days, I wonder if I was really safe back then. I am sure that there were just as many predators during my childhood as there are now. Well, parents are much more aware of the potential problems now. The TV news is always talking about bad things happening to children. So, a lot of parents are more worried now.
Maybe the parks in Jordan should have police men or women on patrol who look for adults who seem to be having inappropriate contact with children (I wish we had that here, but there is barely enough money to hire police to investigate serious crimes). I suppose it is sometimes hard to distinguish what is appropriate and what is not. It certainly is here. But, from what you are saying, it sounds like the usual situation in Jordan is women going to the park with children. So, if a man is seen in the park, maybe there is something going on that needs investigating. Of course, I suppose that fathers sometimes take their children to the park. If I have a child someday, I would certainly do that.
Please visit my blog. I finally posted something new.
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Hey David,
Good to see you… I usually feel that i am not ready to move to another blog till i hear from you… funny eh?
About parks… the same thing applies to me, when i was five or six, we were playing in the streets, we were sent to run errands around one kilomoeter from the house… today, my nehew… well we don’t even allow him to go downstairs alone! I am not sure what is worse our parents’ ignorance or our overprotection? in a way paersn’t ignorance combined with divine protection is better.. since we have more survival skills compared to my nephew… however… i just feel too paranoid sending him alone to the streets… how would he defend himself in the face of predators? and if something happens.. wouldn’t that be negligence? and that is punishable by law nowadays… it is all complex.
Will definitely visit your blog
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You know, I have never seen My Big Fat Greek Wedding. I have heard it is good. I should watch it sometime.
I just saw a really excellent BBC miniseries. It is called The Buddha of Suburbia. It is the story of a young man (played by Naveen Andrews) with an Indian father and an English mother. It deals with some powerful themes like coming of age, prejudice, drug abuse, and sexuality. One of the characters is played by an Indian/English actress named Nisha Nayar. I think she is really attractive! Well, I think you might appreciate this story. It is based on a novel by Hanif Kureishi.
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