Archive for June, 2006

How fragile we are

Last time I was on the bus in London, an old lady came on board, she was really very well dressed, very graceful and dignified.  She came and naturally I gave her my chair, she answered me sweetly “Love, I can not sit down, because if I do, I will not be able to stand again, Thank you for asking though”.  She wanted to go down two stops after she got on.  Her friend will meet her at the bus stop, where they will go to   a social club where she started going after her husband passed away, and her children left the house.  She likes it there because, she meets lots of people her age and they entertain each other. Yes, I started a conversation with her before her stop.
 As the bus approached her stop, she started walking to the front door, but some car stopped unexpectedly in front of the bus and the driver had to make an unexpected break, and the lady could not balance herself and she fell backward one piece! My immediate reaction was to jump and check if she is alive, she was.  her immidiate reaction was to put her hands on her eyes because she felt humiliated. I am not sure how i knew this, it was a feeling that hit me, the way she looked, the way she spoke, the things she said… I looked at her face, and seeing the pain she was in I could not stop a sob that started forming in the back of my throat… few people stood up and started helping …they checked if she is ok, if she needs us to call the ambulance, she was ok… she was really ok… there was a sense of collective panic… this lady was very lucky that her head missed the chairs by few millimetres, because if she did not she would have definitely been dead….

By the time she was talking to us, she removed her hands from her face and started covering her legs that were slightly exposed because of the fall, It all happened very quickly, in few minutes really  we helped her stand up.  At that point my tears were officially forming… I tried to be discreet about it, and so I went down with her and walked her to her club while barely able to fight tears… Usually, I am a very unemotional person, I don’t know what hit me, seeing her shame and humiliation for falling down… a woman who could be injured, who could die, and the only pain she acknowledged at the moment was her shame… something inside me snapped and i could not stop myself from crying… the moment she went into her club, I had to sit down on the stairs and sob away!!! I am not sure what was it really all about… was it feeling sorry for the lady? Or was it about me … maybe imagining myself in her shoes and feeling sorry for myself? I am not sure…

Ironically, I am thinking about this now, because I am listening to Fragile by Sting… we are really really fragile.

If blood will flow when fresh and steel are one
Drying in the colour of the evening sun
Tomorrows rain will wash the stains away
But something in our minds will always stay
Perhaps this final act was meant
To clinch a lifetimes argument
That nothing comes from violence and nothing ever could
For all those born beneath an angry star
Lest we forget how fragile we are
On and on the rain will fall
Like tears from a star like tears from a star
On and on the rain will say
How fragile we are how fragile we are
On and on the rain will fall
Like tears from a star like tears from a star
On and on the rain will say
How fragile we are how fragile we are
How fragile we are how fragile we are
 

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