My dad is important! a trip to Poland
I have been in Poland for the last ten days, if you are expecting an account about the Polish culture and architecture, you are looking in the wrong place; this is an account of the scandalous gossip that took place in a youth exchange in a small city called Lublin in Poland, where as a matter of fact Jordan was participating.
As few of you would know, one of the things I enjoy most in life is organizing youth exchange programs, to get young people from Jordan to travel and learn something new. I work with people who are over 18 years old, convincing myself that they are adults and legally, culturally and religiously responsible for their acts. Those last two weeks proved that actually they are children, and socially if anything happens I am the one to bear all the responsibility!
My team was very mixed, I am not going to give any names, but we had the conservative, the hypocrite, the ultra liberal and the unexposed, and of course the responsible and open minded. I am so grateful to have 2 young people in my team, a great young lady whose open-mindedness and responsibility will forever leave a mark on my heart, and a guy who would be most probably considered a social outcast in Amman and who the only words that would express my feelings towards him are love and pride a little bit like am other maybe! Together we were the best team; we impressed the hell out of everyone with our language skills and intellect, and all the gorgeous leaflets and posters and presentations the team prepared… and of course the little items of food we brought with us.. JORDAN RULES!
When it came to the social aspect, and individually I thought few of my team members needed kafen 3ala il dayer in several occasions! To start with, few are not more than spoiled brats, who live in a world of their own, honestly the way some girls in Amman talk and behave is sickening and repulsive and completely unimpressive… yuck!!! I was ashamed and disappointed of the dala3,constant stream of naghasheh, silly feminin games and the extreme obsession with makeup and hair and high heals, even when we were in a farm in the middle of nowhere! But this is no where as shameful as the fact that these super intelligent twenty something girls are so dependent on their dadies’ pockets, that they are clueless to the fact that they are adults and have to solve their problems on their own. They actually think that their dads would help them whever they are, it makes me wonder how would they ever survive without papa?! As for the guys… yeee don’t even start me with the double standards and the hypocrisy.
It made me wonder whose fault is that we are a third world, the hypocrisy of men of the air-headedness of women… No wonder, men think we are less than they are… we do our best, actually we go out of our way to let them think act like that.
One of the things that happened, was that we usually try to mix the girls from all countries together in the rooms, and we do the same with the boys boys/girls are strictly forbidden to the disappointment of some of you! so what happens is an Italian girl connected with a French guy, and to my chagrin went back to the room to hang out with her, where two of my most flirty, spoiled girls stay. I wish this happened with the other two girls who were more conservative and would have definitely carried themselves and handles the situation better
We had this huge hysterical, dramatic reation, where my girls tried to get the boy outprobably not very nicely and when he did not want to leave because he thought they were rude. She came to me threatening me with her dad’s influence.
Obviously the boy left the room and obviously it was a cultural misunderstanding and difference and obviously it is expected to face things like that when people leave their safe environment and obviously they could have solved the problem smartly if they were experience and obviously with dad or no dad the problem would have been solved anyway, because actually no one there knows who dad is and no one cares… as a matter of fact this became a point that was taken against Jordanians not having personality of our own, and being so corrupt!! and obviously I was so damn irritated that I had to be not so nice the girl!
What was really funny is that when dad’s position was mentioned, one of the Egyptian guys said “ eh ya3ni, 7adritik bint afandem wi i7na wlad kalbi ya3ni?!!” and an ironic game started about who dad is, when one of the guys in my team said the most intelligent thing ever “abouy insan” which means my dad is a human being! Which awarded us a massive cheering from all the other teams! and closed the door for good.
The project was fun, it was interesting, and it was definitely very educational. But most of all, I learnt we would be better off, when we use our intelligent brains instead of daddy’s postions. So if you happen to be in one of my teams, and your dad is important dont tell me, because that would not impress me at all!! actually i would think you are silly and without personality!
lol,
Looks like you had your hands full Mariam.Ye3teeky el3afyeh.
See, I have a problem with the way kids are brought up OUTSIDE their homes. In the states I love the way kids are taught from day one how to be independent and think for themselves, but that also could turn them too Americanized, and then back home they are brought up dependents. Very few kids no matter where they are raised they would shine to become genuine and down to earth regardless.
I guess it all falls under the INHOME way of raising up kids.
Interesting post.Thank You for sharing.
Peace
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I am glad I am not a program coordinator, my response would have simply been “khoshi fi t**i inti w abooki”
amma 3alam…
jameed the dicatator
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WEST AMMAN KIDS THINK LIKE THAT
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there is something fundamentally flawed in the upbringing of children in the majority of families in our region. the concept of responsibility and accountability is almost nonexistent, offspring are spoon-fed everything as if they're children well into their adulthood, even when the family has limited means. young adults well into their 20s have no problem taking pocket money from their parents without a bit of shame.. just to go out dressed in the latest fashion and go to the cool hangouts, then they'd go on to say “baba beddi atzawaj”. it's disheartening seeing all these young men with perfectly gelled hair and very pointy shoes spending their time in chunks of hours just sitting on the side of road checking out the giggling girls walking by.
parents are supposed to help their children, i'm not against that, but there should be a line between “help” and “spoiling” with the latter we end up with a generation of brats, like the ones in your story Mariam. i'm not generalizing, i know not everyone is like that, but sadly the spoiled brats appear to be the majority.
–Oleander
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An interesting post…
lol, the first thing that crossed my mind was a line that my eldest bro use when he gets into situations like that “fa67tona 2odam el2ajaneb”
And this is not the only issue that is happening around here, I'd say there's also wastah, ma7sobyeh, 3asha2ryeh… all could be used for evil… perhaps it's not the kids fault, it's the society they live in? and how they raised and forced to become what they are now?
Noor
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Ifft my hands were beyond full, but i did a good job
I discovered that sometimes you need to be a cold hearted strict cruel human being in order to be good 
I am very glad that they went back home safe, and I am hoping that they had a great time, i mean these girls were taught a lesson in real life… who knows maybe they will start having their own personalities from now on.
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lol… believe me i was so tempted, it took a very big excerice of self control not to!
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yup….tell me about it, it is actually sad, because they are smart, intellectual and very good looking… who do you think people who have all these qualities lack self confidence?
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I agree with you completely, our kids are so spoiled, and i wonder how and why we became like this? not so many years ago, we were trying to survive the issues of foced immigration, and trying to build a life, let alone a career and safety and stability and all that… we did a great job… so when did we change from being a fighting ambitious society to a spoiled, shallow one?
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Wallah ya nour fada7ouna udam il ajaneb! one of the egyptian boys was a bit more than flirting with every girl he was representing liberalism, so the girls asked him, so do you have a girl friend? and he says, no and if I do i will never marry her, my wife has to be as pure as milk!!!
DUH!
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ma bas toomha gher toom oomha….
So much hypocricy in our society….but that's a different subject ….
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hey,,surfed into madas journal by chance,,and this blog grabbed my attention,,as i often participate in youth exchange programs,,in italy ,,,greece,,egypt…
anyway,,,i have a question,,,why from the beginning such people were picked to represent Jordan??? if young guyes and young ladies have nothing special in personality,,creativity,and ethics they shouldn't have been chosen,,,
I say this because i know how youth are picked to participate in youth exchanges,,,yu3ny bel 3arabi ,el ekhteyar '3air dakeek abadan w 3ashwa2y,,lazem ykoon madroos,,mesh la2enno folan akho sa7bi wella areeby akhdo ma3y,,,la2enno hai som3et balad,,,mesh ra7 yiji walad 3omro 18 saneh y5arrebha,,
sorry for my attitude but i had a similar experience w kont madghoot menha ktir,,
bye
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